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Q. My ex partner has taped me being abusive to my children. I am trying to look like a good mother - have
a blown it?
A. Don't worry. CAFCASS will not take this abuse into consideration. Remember CAFCASS IS ON
YOUR SIDE!!
Q. I lied in my statement, and my partner can prove it. Should i worry.
A. No, we are not really interested in the statements, true or false. You may think, that the fact
that you would lie on oath, would discredit you, but it doesn't, so don't worry!
Q. My children have a lot of time off school, and are late almost daily. My partner has raised concerns
about this. The school is also interfering, and are getting on my nerves. I have been seen threatening people at the school,
and recently ended up in a fight in the playground - what should i do?
A. Move schools. Start again. You will get a fresh start, and everything you were doing wrong at
the previous school, will be ignored by CAFCASS. You have two years to improve, so no need to hurry.
Q. My children and their father are very close. In fact, my new partner ripped up all my photos of the children,
in front of them, because he found out, that they had seen their dad. I had told the children not to tell him, but they would
not stop talking about their dad. How can i resolve this, and make them hate their dad.
A. Turn your children against their dad. It's a form of mental abuse, but acceptable to CAFCASS.
Start, by telling the children, that their dad hates them. Refuse to accept Christmas and birthday presents. This will upset
the children, but don't worry - they will blame their dad. When CAFCASS get involved, tell the children that their dad is
trying to put them in care. A good one, is to pretend their dad is coming to take them out. Have them waiting, then pretend
dad has not turned up. It works a treat. Have them wait for him outside their school. When dad does not show, they will be
scared. Watch them cry for half an hour, then turn up. You will be the hero, dad will be to blame. Constantly feed your children
negative information about their dad. You have almost 2 years to do this , so there's no rush.
Q. My children were very close to the paternal grandparents. The grandmother has cancer, and will be undergoing
major surgery, which is very risky. She is worried, that she will never see the children again. What should i do?
A. Nothing. Are you going soft on me?. In fact, ring her, and gloat!
Q. But what about the children's act of 1989.
A. This act, is fast becoming seen as the women's act of 1989. The affect on children is now being
overlooked by CAFCASS. If it is clear from the start, that the woman is messing with the children's head, there is an argument
that she should not retain residence of the children. But we don't accept that (think about it, if we used common sense, and
acted quickly, we would be out of work).
Q. WOW - it looks like i cannot lose. Who do i thank for this.
A. Well, tell you friends about CAFCASS. The number of women stopping children seeing the their
dad, is very high, but we need more!
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Q. I chose my partner, because he was a nice guy, and i knew he would look after me, and any children, i
had planned. But he threatens to report me, if i don't treat the children better. What can i do.
A. You have no time to lose. Make false allegations to the police. This will come in at a later
date. It does not matter, if he has not done anything, the fact you have accused him will be invaluable later. CAFCASS accept
unfounded allegations from women, but not proven allegations from men - so you cannot lose.
Q. I have claimed, that my ex partner never spent any time with the children. I forgot, that he was such
a proud dad, that he took a camera or camcorder, every time he took them out. The truth is, he did a lot of activities with
the children, and took my son to football every Saturday and Sunday. What should i do?
A. Don't worry, this is a minor oversight. CAFCASS will not allow the use of photos or video evidence.
We will accept your version of events.
Q. I like to experiment with drugs, and my new partner does a bit of dealing, earning money, from regular
trips abroad. Will this go against me, as the father of my children has found out
A. No, we have no problem with this. We are not too concerned about the drugs. Just accuse the
children's father of drinking too much. That usually does the trick.
Q. Yes, but at the time of our split, my ex partner did not drink, and had not been out for a year. He had
been at home with the children. I was the one out drinking all the time, and i regularly featured in the local papers 'OUT
ON THE TOWN' section. I am actually the one who gets violent on beer, and have started on my ex partner, as a result. What
should i do.
A. Just say that he did it, its that easy.
Q. WHAT'S GOING ON, my CAFCASS report, has gone in the fathers favour, and recommended contact, or shared
residence. I thought you were on my side.
A. We can't have that. Let me have his/her name, and we will remove him from the case. Don't worry
- a new report will be produced, recommending the father never see his children again. You see, we are on you side!
Q. I have threatened to kill my ex partner, and his family. I think i may have been taped. Does this look
bad. Remember, he is supposed to be the violent one. Will people realise i have been lying.
A. Accuse him of the same. Women are listened to in such cases, men are not taken seriously. Make
the accusations as bad as you can. It will get in the report, who cares if you have made it up.
Q. Will all this have a lasting effect on my children, and if so, won't the government stop it.
A. This will effect your children for life, and is seen by many, as a form of abuse. But don't
worry - we are in a department run my Margaret Hodge. She is the friend of Tony Blair, who was promoted to children's minister.
This was despite the fact, that she had been leader of a council where, children had been abused and raped, for 10 years.
So don't concern yourself. CAFCASS is in good hands!
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